Lena at 8 Months

Lena,
You are 8 months old! You've made it 2/3 the way through your first year. We measured you on Sunday and you're 28 inches long (90th percentile) and 19 lbs heavy (75th percentile).  You've been hanging onto these percentiles for the last four months, with a little bump at 6 months.  This month:

- You've perfected crawling and standing up. You're able to stand up and then slowly lower down in a squat. It's conveniently reduced (virtually eliminated) the number of falls and face plants. Hopefully we'll avoid too many more bruised cheekbones (Month 7).
 

- You are a fast crawler. You jet all over the living room and house. You pant loudly when you do it. Since you begin panting immediately, I don't think you're actually out of breath. Are you imitating the dogs? We recently started excluding them from the living room. They're not stoked on the arrangement, but dad and I much prefer it. I'm down to vacuuming that room twice a week and you stay SO much cleaner. Added bonus: you're not trying to eat clumps of dog hair anymore.
 

- You have fully entered the separation anxiety phase. When either your dad or I leave the room, even to just walk into the kitchen, which is within your line of site, you freak out. Big, huge tears, screams, throwing yourself in the ground. It's quite dramatic! We're starting to get desensitized to it but it still makes me sad.
 

- You have such incredible personality. You recently began whispering gibberish to yourself when you crawl and play. It's incredibly adorable. You are free with smiles and giggles. Your dad can really get you going.
 

- I didn't think it was possible, but your eyes have gotten even bluer. You are going to make many people swoon with those eyes. They are a deep, crystal shade of blue.
- Your next tooth (teeth) are coming in. The bottom incisor to the left of your two current ones is almost there. I can't wait for it to break through - you're a hot mess at bedtime!
 

- You love giving your mom kisses. Sometimes when I come home, you plant a big slobbery one on me (you don't purse your lips yet). Sometimes you do tons in a row. I LOVE it. Sadly, you've only given dad a few. You always shy away when he goes to kiss you and I think it's his scruff.
 

- You are a food monger. To date, you haven't turned down a thing I've given you. I have to feed you before I eat or you get really pissed off with me. You whine and grab for whatever I'm eating. You even ate some puréed Thai green curry stir fry. Not picky at all. Yesterday, you grabbed dad's Pb&J crust to suck on. You loved it. We were relieved to find out you aren't allergic to peanuts. We also discovered you love sucking on whole wheat hard stick pretzels. We take them away before they get too small.

You are so much fun! Now, please start going to be easily and sleeping through the night. K? Thanks.

Sleep Perspective

We've always struggled with Lena's sleep.  She's definitely not the worst sleeper, but she's never been a great sleeper.  As a newborn, she wanted to be held to fall asleep.  The introduction of the Fisher Price Rock 'n Play helped us greatly, as it made her feel secure.  But she outgrew it (in length) and we've sputtered along, trying to figure out what would work for her.  First, she'd only sleep in her crib or a Pack 'n Play if her head was elevated (and only for an hour or two, at that).  When I went back to work, we threw in the towel and officially started cosleeping.  You've heard it before and you'll hear it again: whatever works!  We all need our sleep.  Despite still being a little freaked out about safety/SIDS (it's in my nature), I actually love cosleeping - I love cuddling with her!  But one of the downsides is I think she wakes more frequently to nurse because she senses me there.  So, it's our ultimate goal to get her in her crib, for good. 

Now, at 7.5 months, we've established a routine.  Around 7 pm, we give her a bath, put her in her pajamas, and read a couple books.  If she's not showing signs of sleepiness, we let her play until she does.  Once she shows signs of sleepiness (for her, it's rubbing her eyes), I'll nurse her to sleep and put her in her crib once she's out cold (flat, no longer needing her head to be elevated!).  This is usually around 8:30-9:00.  She'll usually sleep there for 2-3 hours and then wake up right around my bed time. So, I bring her into the spare bed (now equipped with bed rails that I scored at a garage sale for $10) and we sleep there all night.  She (and thus we) wake(s) every 2-3 hours to feed.   I wake up feeling like I slept but not well.

I've been reluctant to adopt any sort of firm sleep method.  I've been operating under the assumption that, ultimately, she will sleep well, but her nervous system and physiology just need to work themselves out to get her there.  Despite the studies, I absolutely cannot do any form of Cry It Out (I turn into a frenzied wreck when she cries for longer than 90 seconds).  The No Cry Sleep Solution helped me identify signs of sleepiness and ways to comfort her (rubbing her back), but I, frankly, don't have the time to keep a sleep log.  I'm happy with showering daily, making dinner 5 nights a week, and getting the dogs walked in there while working full time.  I can't be bothered with trying to keep a sleep journal for her.  So, I just decided to do what I can to encourage a good sleep environment and have her work out the rest.  

So when we went camping this weekend, I was a little nervous to step away from our routine.  Because, after all, the books tell you routine is key!  Get your baby out of her routine and you start all over!  But, there were no baths (or bedtime books, we forgot those) at the campground.  Contrary to my fears, it actually helped me gain perspective on her sleep.  Outside, away from artificial lights and blinds, I realized her Circadian rhythm is firmly established.  She still went down right around 8:30-9:00 (never the 7 pm all the books tell you!).  But being outside, I realized that's a perfectly natural time to go to bed; the world around her tells her "it's dark, now it's bedtime."  And even though we were cosleeping and it was freaking cold at night (around 35 degrees F!  But I think she was nice and warm nestled next to me in the sleeping bag), she only awoke 2-3 times per night.  And as soon as that morning light broke at dawn, her little eyes would pop open and she's smile up at me (my eyes pop open at dawn, too.  Gee, I wonder where she gets her sleep pattern?).  Incidentally, after 30 minutes of playing inside the car (where we slept) each morning, she was ready to go back to sleep for another hour (she gets this from her dad - he loves to get up, eat a bowl of cereal, and go back to bed). 

Last night, we went through the routine and she fell asleep around 9 pm. I put her in her crib and went and slept in my own bed until 3 am!  Then, we slept together in the spare bed.  She woke up twice between 3 am and 5:45 am, when I got up.  Then, I put her in her crib, where she slept until 6:30 and I got ready for work. I've been so anxious for her to "sleep through the night."  But when I step back from the situation, I realize she's actually sleeping pretty well.  A six hour stretch and then two awakenings for a total of 10 hours in bed is sleeping well.  It's not textbook well - she's not going down at 7 pm and sleeping until 7 am straight- but it's well.  And I'm starting to think those textbook babies are few and far between. 

P.S.  In the last few weeks, she's also begun unlatching, putting her head down, and falling asleep on her own (i.e. without a nipple in her mouth) - both at bedtime and after middle of the night nursing sessions.  This is huge to me! We got in the habit early on of her nursing to sleep.  Again, all the textbooks say don't do it.  I felt a little guilty (again!), but I just trusted that one day she would wean herself from nursing, and that would include not needing to nurse to fall asleep.  She's definitely not weaned from nursing, but she's treating it as more of a food source and less as a sleep aid.

I Dare You to Watch this Video and Not Tear Up

This post isn't actually about Lena.
Well, not directly, at least.  But when you become a parent, everything tends to circle back to your kid(s). 

So I can't help but think about my sweet little baby when I watch this family. About how I never want her to go through what this man went through (everyone keeps referring to him as a kid, which I get because he just turned 18.  But let's all agree, he's so much older than his 18 years).  How I don't want Mike and I to ever go through what his parents have. How I love his relationship with his siblings (especially his sister Grace). 

As you may suspect, I identify with this story on another level.  Of course a story about someone dying from cancer makes me think of my dad.  There's a part in the video where Zach's girlfriend says that what she fears most is leaving the hospital after he dies; leaving knowing that he's not coming with her.  I'll never forget the walk down the hall of the hospital back to the car after my dad died.  It was so surreal and felt so uncomfortably final. 

Zach's attitude and bravery remind me so much of my dad.  Although he didn't want to die, my dad wasn't scared of death.  I think he would have identified with two of Zach's quotes:

"Death is just another thing on the agenda, kind of.  Yeah, it’s scary.  But the reason it’s scary is because you don’t know what’s next, or if there is a next.  So, it’s kinda like sitting in the dark.  And so you can either chose to be freaking out in the dark, and thinking “okay, what’s out there,” or you could just relax and fall asleep, and just be happy and content with everything.” - Zach Sobiech
 

“I want to be remembered as a kid who went down fighting…and didn’t really lose.” - Zach Sobiech 

Honestly, God forbidden I'm ever in the same situation, I don't know if I can be that strong.  But I'd sure try.

Lens at 7 Months

Lena,
You are 7 months old! Honestly, it sounds just about right. When I look back at all the changes you've gone through since your birth, it seems appropriate that it's taken the better part of a year to get here! Your seventh month was by far the most momentous! At 7 months, you:

- Are crawling! Everywhere! It started as just an army crawl right around six months. After army crawling for a week, you found your way onto all fours. Sometimes you move your legs and arms in sync and sometimes you still just move your arms. Lucky for you, we have hardwood floors that facilitate this slide. Regardless of the method, you always pant loudly when you do it. It's adorable. We immediately had to go out and baby's proof the house. Nothing is safe from you - cats, dogs, laundry baskets...)

-Almost immediately after starting your army crawl, you learned to sit up. You spent an entire Sunday working in it and perfected it by Monday. You learned by rolling on your side and pushing up with the arm nearest the ground. It was a bit wobbly at first, but once you figured it out, you were solid.

-Have two teeth! These three milestones - first teeth, crawling, and sitting up - happened all in the same week. I heard a choir of angels sing when they poked through. It took months for those suckers to break through. Luckily we've only had one biting while nursing incident...so far.

- You weren't content to sit and crawl, and moved straight to standing up. When you started standing a week after you began crawling, I knew we were in trouble. It has been simultaneously fun and terrifying to watch your standing evolve. You now pull yourself up with an aid with no trouble and are experimenting with standing without help. You'll either pull yourself up to standing with the help of an object (or mom or dad) and then let go or you get in a crouch and stand from there. I suspect the transition from standing to walking will happen as quickly as the transition from crawling to standing did. No one would be surprised if you walked by 8 months.

-Are nonstop moving. You don't even take a break to nap! Watching you requires constant vigilance. You wiggle when you're held and it's not on your terms. Restaurants are really difficult these days. You don't like being confined and the only time you'll allow it is in your carseat in the car or in a high chair to eat. Your bouncy chair has been banished to the garage and your exersaucer is only used from the outside, as an aid to stand.

- Are starting to show the beginning stages of separation anxiety. It's worst in the evenings - which, let's be honest, has never been a good time for you. If your dad or I leave the room, you start crying. You're also too smart to be distracted.

 A little pre-photo shoot shot

 Not quite sure about this photo shoot

Again, dad's on hand

 Don't forget the fox for perspective

Scheming on her next move

  which happens to be the very popular slide out

  The bow actually lasted longer than we thought it would

 Standing like a champ

First Mother's Day

I was dead set against celebrating Mother's Day. I decided this a few years ago; it was solidified last year when we were at the San Diego Zoo on Mother's Day. It was a warm day and the zoo is large and overrun with children. I repeatedly heard the phrase "oh great, thanks a LOT [insert child's name], your tantrum is totally ruining my Mother's Day!" Um, ladies, what do you expect? Your kid is overwhelmed, excited, off their nap schedule, and likely eating way more sugar than normal! It just seems like there is so much pressure to have this one "perfect" day a year that everyone - guest of honor, child, partner - is setting her/himself up for disappointment. So, I decided to just forgo the day (if you're curious, Mike and I also don't celebrate Valentine's Day).

I should add that I don't judge or begrudge those who do celebrate Mother's Day. I know more than ever now how much work goes into being a parent and I do think every parent should be celebrated! Similarly, I'm happy to celebrate Mother's Day with my mom. But, I decided it wasn't for me.

And then, after discussing the details of my Mother's Day aversion with a friend, I realized I should celebrate the Day - not for me, but for Lena. It occurred to me that once she's older and can grasp the concept of the Day (and make me gifts in school), it may mean a lot to her to show me how much she loves me. So, I've decided to celebrate it - but with no strings attached. No grand expectations, no big disappointments. I'm keeping the bar low.

Except for my birthday - on my birthday, bring it on.

Fittingly, Mike's job with the UC Union scheduled a meeting in Riverside for the whole weekend, so it was just me and Lena all weekend. I know it sounds corny, but for this full-time working mom, 60+ hours straight with Lena was exactly the gift I wanted. She's incredibly cute. She's getting independent and exploratory but is still cuddly when she's tired. She's smiley and has a good sense of humor. Yesterday, I was doing a HIIT interval and she thought burpees were HILARIOUS. She just sat there and cracked up as I hopped up and down. She then tried to sit on my stomach and use my legs for balance to stand while I was doing sit ups. We ended the session with her chewing on the yoga mat.

She slept in an extra hour, took a 1.5 hour nap in the morning, and then she and I took a 2.5 (!!!) hour nap in the afternoon. It was my first nap in at least four months and it was divine. I had planned to take her to the park for a picnic but was happy to substitute the excursion with a nap.

And that was that. No brunch, no breakfast in bed (though if you know me well, you know breakfast in bed is not a gift to me, it's a quick way to set my OCD in high gear), no big dinner. No disappointments! Just a sweet, happy baby, and a relaxed mom.

 Bedhead, two days in a row.  Sunday, above, and Monday, below.

 Cuddly and smiley

 Cheeks!

 Mornings spent cuddling before getting out of bed are our favorite

 The table is a favorite thing lately. Lena's all about standing up.  And the pouty face above has been a fixture this week.

 No workout's complete without trying to eat the yoga mat. 

 Oh, you were trying to use this mat?

 Sneakers aren't for running, they're for playing with shoelaces (a new favorite toy)

 Nugget's sad the snearkers aren't being used to go for a run.  

 She recently discovered two new mobile jungle gyms (aka Puck and Nugget).  They're great with her.

 Outtake photo, not a good facial expression for either of them.

A Good Weekend

Lena seemed to pop out of her fussy mood and we had a great weekend! For what seems like months, Lena hasn't been sleeping well. We've had trouble putting her to sleep- she'd cry and fight going to bed and then wake up to nurse every one to two hours. It's been tough! During the day, she'd start crying at the drop of a hat- if she was sitting up and teetered over, if you took something from her, etc. In essence, she's been having a rough time! When Mike took her to her 6 month check up last Saturday, the doctor told him that she'd be really fussy the 7 to 10 days before a developmental milestone. At that time, she had been fussy since the prior Thursday. So, we were in for another fussy week.

Last Sunday, she mastered sitting up on her own. She lays on her side and pushes up from sitting. The first few days, she was wobbly and would randomly teeter over. But she's gotten a lot better over the week. Last night, I noticed that when she gets unsteady, she now adjusts her legs wider to balance (she usually sits with her heels together and her legs in a diamond).

On Saturday, we also noticed that she has a "hello" wave. She puts her hand under her chin and waves with her fingers. We had a friend stay with us this weekend. When she met him, she kept doing that and he asked me if she was waving hello. I said I didn't know but had noticed her doing it lately. That day, she met four new people and kept doing it (and also did it last night when saying goodbye to family members). We think she picked it up from the other little girl at daycare, who does that.

On Saturday afternoon, she also got much better at crawling. She kinda gave it up last week (perhaps she was focusing on sitting up?) so I wondered if she was done for now. Then, I was sitting in the recliner and she was playing on the rug. I heard her coo "whooo;" I looked up and she motored over to me. I had been cleaning her exersaucer so I used the can of cleaning wipes as bait to get some video. I'm starting her young with chores.

The best part? Nine days after her fussiness began, her fussiness bubble burst. She slept better Saturday and Sunday nights, took three (one 2.5 hour!) naps on Sunday, and was a happy girl!

 

 

 

Lena at 6 Months

Lena,
You're half a year old! I can't believe it! The last three months have flown by. I realized when I've gone to write these monthly blog entries the last three months, you have been cranky and I've tried to not harp on the crankiness that's happening at the moment. What do you have against the 16th of the month? ;)  You measured 28 inches in length (>99th percentile) and 16 pounds 11 ounces heavy (70th percentile) at your 6 month check-up.  You're so tall!

At 6 months, you:

-Are so smart. I know every parent thinks their kid is a genius, but the doctor confirmed it at your 6 month check up when you were doing things that usually don't develop until around 9 months. Examples are: pushing objects away if you don't want them ("ok, I guess you're not hungry!" is a common phrase heard in our house), flirting with yourself in the mirror (you literally push me away to get a better look), and trying to drink from cups.

-You've backed off of eating solids. You like to play with the food and the spoon but don't really eat the food. So we're not pushing it. We retry weekly.

-You mastered sitting up on Sunday, two days shy of your half-birthday. You push up on your side and then up to sitting. Now, you sit up all the time. You're pretty good. (It reminds me of mastering an arm balance in yoga. Often, its a lot easier than it looks, as long as you know how to set it up and where to put your arms and trunk -a little core strength doesn't hurt, either). Occasionally, you fall over and start crying, but you'll get better. With your new found strength, I've excitedly begun putting you in the seat of the cart at the store. I've been REALLY looking forward to this, as your car seat takes up so much room and the carrier is awkward to grocery shop with. Now, I may be putting you back in the carrier. You want to grab everything and put it in your mouth. Yesterday, we played a game where I'd take something off the shelf, you're shove it in your mouth, I'd take it back and put it in the cart, and you'd start screaming. Repeat. So, I carried you and pushed the cart. Sigh.

-Which reminds me, you get so mad when I take things from you. You're very curious now and hear the word "no" so often that you're actually starting to know what it means. Yesterday, you were obsessed with playing with the fireplace screen. Each time you went over there, I'd tell you no and you'd stop and turn around to play with your toys. If course, you tested this a couple times, but you're learning some boundaries

-Give me hugs and kisses (but not on demand). The other morning I was holding you and you were facing out. You spin around, there your arms around my neck, and squeezed. Now you do it often and sometimes add an open mouth kiss. I love it. You also have begun reaching your arms out to me when you want to be held.

-Still haven't had those pesky teeth break through. I think it'll be like the cart - I'll be eager for it to happen and once they're here I'll miss the way it was before.

-Are really grabby and pinchy. When nursing, you love to take your bottom arm, reach around, and pinch my loose arm skin. Repeat. OUCH. Other favorite places to grab is skin on my face and neck. (Despite the picture I'm painting, I don't have loose skin hanging on my face and neck...)

 It started off good...

 But you don't sit still for long these days...

 Suddenly mom is pretty interesting!

 Thankfully dad's always on hand during these pictures to make sure you don't fall off the chair.

 But that doesn't mean you don't try.

 Cute stuff.

 Back on the chair.  Success!